Why I need an agent:

I'm just an artist. A free spirit. Ex-raver, ex-hippy, ex-dreamer. All I can do is art so in a world of business, art is all I get. Yet the reality is, even in a world of AI content, perhaps especially, you'll get no finer novelty than my deviant ramblings.
In short; I'm horrible at responsibility.
In short; business, I'm gonna wreck it.
In short; I'm not a project I'm an infinite stream of consciousness creating an infinite stream of crunchy ideas and steamy suspicions.
Conceding it's not short anymore; In long; I need someone to do the business and I will spew the ideas, all day, I guarantee. I'll be surreal too and probably douchy too so I'll need someone to be the professional end of it. I know it costs me money but it's worth it because I'll just be unhinged and uncommitted to business deals in daily life. I figure being on top of the business is best done by an agent because that way I can truely devote myself to my image, which won't even have to be fake.
Let's be badass and make money!
Also: Let's just be badass.
Also: Well, I will be badass and you can manage that in a badass fashion? Sounds good.
I'm glad we had this talk. LOL!